Why Did My Ex Girlfriend Follow Me on Instagram? (and more)

So you’re just minding your business one day and your phone buzzes.

You tap the screen open and see the all too recognizable Instagram logo, hiding up on your shelf of notifications.

With a quick flourish of the thumb, you pull it down to see what happened.

“Patricia Denise has requested to follow you”

Now normally, this wouldn’t mean anything to you. However, this Patricia Denise is someone you know. It’s your ex-girlfriend, and by now you’re probably feeling a mixture of confusion and excitement.

You might think to yourself “yes, no contact is finally working”, and you might be right. Or you might not, it depends.

So why did she suddenly follow you on Instagram? Should you even let your ex follow you on Instagram?

I’ll answer those questions and many more.

Your Ex Followed You On Instagram Again Because She’s Curious.

When your ex follows you again it’s because she’s thinking about you. Following you on Instagram is a low-risk way for her to check up on you. She may be testing the waters to see if you’re still single because she misses you.

Regardless of whether or not she misses you though, remember that you guys are still split up. Her following you alone is not enough to make a determination of what she’s thinking.

But chances are, she’s keeping tabs on you because she misses you.

Look, there’s no way around it. It doesn’t matter who unfollowed who, or if you were never following each other in the first place. She’s only following you because she feels its in her interest to do so.

But why is it in her interest? It’s hard to say with 100% certainty, but the only plausible reason is she misses you, and wants to see how you’re doing. Now don’t get it twisted, that doesn’t mean that she wants to get back together with you.

Following you is a low risk way for her to see how your life is going. Despite that fact that you’ve broken up, she likely still cares about you. Even to this day, my first ex watches all my Instagram stories. I know we’ve both moved on, but she’s admitted to missing me on several occasions.

It does happen all the time.

What should I do now?

Nothing. Just because your ex followed you on Instagram doesn’t mean that she’s open to getting back with you. I know it’s tempting to want to read into every little move, but just following you on Instagram isn’t enough to say anything. Although she may be hoping you’ll reach out, as we’ll talk about later, you don’t need to do anything at this stage.

I personally don’t think should even let her follow you, unless you’re completely confident that you’re over her (and chances are, if you’ve searched for this topic specifically, you aren’t).

Part of the reason I recommend blocking your ex-girlfriend on social media is to avoid obsessing over small details like this. While I know most of you won’t, I have personally seen far too many guys get all worked up about an ex following them on social media when they should be putting in the focus on improving themselves.

You’re supposed to be using no contact to get over her, not worrying about what she’s doing.

Again, it’s entirely possible she’s just curious and still isn’t interested in getting back together with you.

Wait for her to reach out to you directly, and when she does, ask her on a date to your place where you’ll have a chance to seduce her.

Okay, so is my ex looking at my Instagram?

No matter who broke up with who, the chances are very high that your ex-girlfriend will look at your profile (probably more than once) after you guys break up. This is why your ex still follows you on Instagram.

Regardless if you want her back or not, you can use this to your advantage if you decide to avoid my advice of blocking her. Post pictures of yourself having a good time with friends and other women. You might wonder, we’ll she see them?

If she uses Instagram regularly and still follows you, the chances of her seeing them are very good. It’ll show her you’re not missing a step after your breakup, and can help rehabilitate your image in her eyes depending on what went wrong in your relationship.

However, you should ONLY attempt this is you’re not emotionally attached to the relationship. This technique works best on women you’ve been seeing casually, or dating seriously for less than a year. I don’t recommend ever using it for serious ex-girlfriends.

What if my ex unfollowed me? What should I do? What does it mean?

She’s could be really pissed at you, hurt by you, or just completely done with all things you.

For some reason, she doesn’t want to see your face.

Ultimately, the reason why doesn’t matter so much.

Women make decisions based on short-lived emotions that are always changing.

What she does today doesn’t predict what she’ll do tomorrow, or even 6 months from now.

So don’t sweat it.

Continue using the no contact rule.

In fact, she’s doing you a favor by unfollowing you. Now you can work on yourself without her watching over your shoulder.

That way, if she reaches out to you, you’ll be a mystery to her.

Women love mysterious men.

Your Ex Followed You On Instagram Again Because She’s Curious.

When your ex follows you again it’s because she’s thinking about you. Following you on Instagram is a low-risk way for her to check up on you. She may be testing the waters to see if you’re still single because she misses you.

Should I follow my ex on Instagram?

I wouldn’t.

It’s not going to help you get her back.

Plus, what are you going to gain from it?

You’re only going to see her having fun with her friends, or possibly the new guy she’s seeing.

Then you’ll start thinking about her, and if you’re still in a rough spot, you’ll find yourself thinking about her, and what she’s doing.

You have better things to do. You should be focused on dating new women, putting on size and strength in the gym, and enjoying being newly single.

Plus, following her violates two of the most important principles of getting her back.

For one, following her isn’t letting her react to you. You’re reacting to her.

Plus, you should be ignoring her after your breakup if you want her back.

Following her is a signal that you’ve not moved on, even if it seems to be small.

You’ve got better things to do my man.

Do them.

Don’t follow her.

Should you block your ex girlfriend on social media?

Yes, you should block your ex-girlfriend on social media until you can confidently say that you are no longer attached to her. The more exposure you have to her life, the harder it’s going to be for you to get on with yours.

The stronger your feelings of attachment, the harder it’s going to be for you to heal and move on with your life. You might find yourself compulsively looking at her Instagram and causing yourself additional unneeded pain.

That’s why important to wait it out until you’ve completely cut the cord with her. There’s no need to waste time obsessing over small details, including things like posting frequency.

But why is my ex posting so much on Instagram? Doesn’t she want me to see it?

Yeah, if your ex-girlfriend suddenly starts posting more on Instagram right after you broke up you can count on it having to do with your relationship ending. If she lets you keep following her as well, she definitely wants you to see it.

I’ve had several ex-girlfriends do this, some for only a couple of weeks, but one for about 2 months. Of course, the posting frequency went down as soon as she shackled up with her new boyfriend.

It’s one of her ways of saying “I’m over you, look at how awesome my life is” even though that’s far from the truth. See, women love to say one thing when they mean another.

She might be trying to tell you that she’s over you, but really when you see this it’s a good sign she’s not as close to over you as she might claim. It’s not a sign you should act on though.

Really, you should block her now before you waste more time wondering about why she’s posted a third selfie with her friends in 3 days. It might be something, but it’s not enough of a something to worry about.

But wait, my ex still has pictures of me on Instagram!

That’s not uncommon at all. My last two exes whom I’ve since become friends with still have pictures of me up on their profiles. For them, these are important memories even though we’re not together. It’s the memory they care about, not our past relationship.

There’s also the possibility that your ex-girlfriend just forgot that they were there and saw no reason to delete them. At the end of the day its her choice. If she’s keeping your pictures up but not reaching out to you, there’s nothing you need to do.

Again, it’s important not to read into small details because they can lead you to reaching out when you should sit on your hands and wait.

So why would an ex follow me and then unfollow me?

Women are dictated by their emotional cycle, so it’s possible she followed you under the guidance of her emotion and then later regretted the choice and decided to unfollow you. It’s also possible that she wanted to quickly check in on you, but she saw something she didn’t like and decided to get lost.

Chances are though, if she unfollowed you she’s feeling something strong. What that emotion is, depends on your relationship. It could be out of anger and not wanting to see your face, or because seeing you makes her mourn the relationship she’s no longer in.

There’s been several breakups where my ex followed me on Instagram again after blocking me.

Actually, this just happened about two weeks ago, even though the breakup happened almost a year ago, and I’m seeing someone else.

She hasn’t reached out, or otherwise done anything else.

See, in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t matter too much.

So don’t sweat it, even if it seems important.

So why does my ex like my picture on Instagram?

Tap tap.

That’s all she really did. She taped her finger twice on a screen and moved on with her life.

You should move on too.

With that being said, I’ve seen women do this because they want to get noticed without having to take the risk of you not replying to a text. It’s a great way to test the waters. Your ex can like all your posts, but still not reach out to you.

Don’t fall prey to the ex-girlfriend recovery sites telling you that her liking a post of yours is a good sign she wants you back. Rather than pursuing, just hold back. Her liking your posts may be a good sign that she’s interested in you still, but you just won’t know until she reaches out.

Wrap up

If you’ve made it this far, let me be the first to say I hope this article was helpful to you. It’s my goal to write the best content possible and get it to as many of you as possible.

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Thank you guys.

Coach Jack

I'm Coach Jack, the owner and founder of Men's Breakup. I help over 1 million men a year radically transform their lives for the better after being dumped. I teach the only breakup recovery method for men only that puts YOU first, and focuses on building long term, masculine happiness that attracts love, wealth, and success into all areas of your life.

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