Tell me if this sounds familiar: you tried your hardest to make it work with her when she told you she was having doubts. Maybe you begged and pleaded with her to stay with you and fought for her until the bitter end. Or maybe you didn’t, instead choosing to withdraw and give her space.
Either way, I’m willing to bet nothing prepared you for the stomach-clenching feeling of discovering that not only did she leave you, but she blocked you on everything too. Your phone, email, Facebook, Instagram, and maybe even LinkedIn too.
Now you’re wondering what happened.
Maybe you’re worried you were an asshole without realizing it. I know you never wanted to hurt her.
Maybe you’re worried about what she thinks about you.
Or perhaps it’s what you really are worried about: her moving on without you by cutting you out of your life like you never mattered at all. Like she never really cared.
And let’s be honest with each other here, I know it’s hurting you more than you care to admit. To feel like you are so easily discarded and blocked like you never meant anything to her at all.
Today my friend, we’re going to straighten out some of these misconceptions – because chances are, it’s not like you’re imagining.
So buckle up buttercup, because…
She May Have Had A Good Reason To Block You
Did you commit one of the cardinal breakup sins? You know…something like this:
Or this:
If you were an absolute asshole to her during the relationship, or during the breakup, it should be pretty clear why she left you and then decided to block you: because she didn’t want your snake ass in her life.
If that’s the case, then slither your ass on out of here, because you got your answer.
Still, reading? Good. Men’s Breakup is for gentlemen, not assholes.
I’m glad to know that you didn’t destroy your ex-girlfriend’s room, or bang another chick behind her back. So you weren’t an absolute asshole. We can still be friends.
But as your friend, I need to tell you the truth.
The aforementioned sins are far from the only mistakes you can make that’ll get you blocked.
By any chance, did you:
- Refuse to give her time and space even after she asked you multiple times for it?
- Continue to creep on her, like all of her photos, and otherwise not leaving her alone?
- Keep asking her multiple times for an explanation or “closure” (whatever that is) after she left you?
- Did you beg and plead with the hope that she would decide to get back together with you?
- Try to guilt her into getting back together with you?
- Did you pull a Ronnie and absolutely lose your shit when she left you? (pictured above)
- Send her long and emotionally charged message about how much she hurt you?
- Were you needy and clingy after she agreed to be friends?
If you did, well…
Because here’s the thing: if you are a regular reader of mine (which you freaking should be, because I can help you) then you know better! You know that you shouldn’t have done any of the above! If you did, then it’s time for you to repent.
Luckily for you, reading the article I have linked below is a great first step to cleansing your soul of sin.
Read More: Never Do Any Of These Things After She Dumps You…Or Else
Put yourself in her shoes for a minute and imagine you dumped her and wanted some space.
How would you feel if she was blowing you up night and day, not listening to you when you asked for space, and otherwise doing her best to be a pest?
When she says she needs space, you need to give it to her.
If that was the case, I would be shocked if you didn’t block her on everything.
Just because she dumped you doesn’t mean she’s happily skipping through a field with next to no emotional burden at all. We don’t live in a Disney fantasy world. Breakups suck, even when you are the one doing the dumping.
If you are actively making it suck more for her, it’s only a matter of time until you get blocked.
That’s called having healthy boundaries. You can’t get mad at her for that.
Maybe that’s not you, though. Maybe you were a perfectly sweet little angel who completely respected her wishes, only to discover that your ass got blocked anyway during your latest social media recon mission that you weren’t supposed to go on.
Read More: Avoid Social Media At All Costs During No Contact
Something clearly happened. But what?
But Jack! She Blocked Me And I Didn’t Do Anything. What Gives?
If she blocked you and you didn’t do anything, I can understand feeling confused and hurt. Heck, I won’t even hold it against you if it looked something like this…
So what gives?
So right away, let’s get this out there: you probably never will know for sure. What I’m about to tell you is an educated guess. In truth, it’s better to accept that you probably never will know for sure why she blocked you. So don’t try to come up with wild conspiracy theories about what is happening. Instead of focusing on something you can’t change, focus on yourself instead.
Read More: 10 Timeless Lessons On Living A Great Life
With that necessary disclaimer out of the way, it’s time for my educated guess. That’s what you’re here for, after all.
If you TRULY did nothing, then she likely blocked you because she is hurting, she wanted to avoid hurting you more, or a combination of both.
In my opinion, it’s usually because she is hurting not because she wants to save you from hurting.
There are several common scenarios that can lead to you getting blocked like this.
If She’s Hurting:
- She may have been given the same advice I give you – which is to avoid social media like the plague after a breakup. I teach that you must either remove her from yours, block her, or quit. If she’s hurting already from the breakup, this can go a long way.
- She may have blocked you because she doesn’t trust herself not to reach out. Think about all the nights you’ve desperately wanted to talk to her like you used to and had to fight the urge.
- If you started posting “flashy” content on social media to make her jealous like many ex-girlfriend recovery frauds advocate, she may have blocked you.
- If you rebounded with a new woman, she may have felt hurt and jealous and blocked you in order to avoid that.
- Alternatively – she may have felt the need to try to impress you / make you realize that you messed up when you were on her social media, and blocking you gives her a break from that.
Read More: Why Is She Jealous Of Me Dating Again?
It’s also possible that her reasons for blocking you included not wanting to hurt you either – especially if you took the breakup poorly.
If She Doesn’t Want To Hurt You
- She doesn’t want to hurt your feelings because she’s genuinely over the breakup and knows that you aren’t.
- If she started seeing someone else, that’s probably the last thing she would want you to see.
- She may feel guilty for her role in ending the relationship, which can sometimes lead to getting blocked.
- If she’s the “clean break” and move-on type – this is also common.
Read More: Why You Shouldn’t Worry About If She’s In A Rebound Relationship
Read More: Is She Actually Happy With Her Rebound Relationship?
Like I said before, it’s impossible to know for sure what her reasons are. Ultimately, neither of us has any idea about what she’s thinking, or why she made the choices that she made.
But I can say one thing for sure, you have the power to control yourself, which is why it’s critically important to understand what I’m about to say next.
Is It True That If She Blocks You, You Win?
The general meaning behind “If she blocks you, you win” is that you were somehow the mature party in the situation because you didn’t resort to blocking her, which I guess some people consider childish?
Apparently, there are people on the internet that think blocking an ex is the equivalent of a childish temper tantrum.
Then again, there are folks out there who believe that…
Just goes to show, be careful who you listen to on the internet: because it’s not true that if she blocks you, you win. As we’ve already seen, she probably has multiple, valid reasons for blocking you.
I mean, what the fuck? Getting dumped isn’t a game. There are no “winners” or “losers”. That doesn’t mean you can’t be extremely successful after getting dumped, where you turn pain into a massive win for yourself.
Do you know how you do that?
Move on from her, and live an awesome freaking life, not because you want revenge on her, but because you deserve it!
While I don’t think that you’re reading this article because you want to win your breakup, I know that deep down inside of you, at least a small part of you wants some kind of comeuppance.
Read More: The Best Way To Get Revenge On Your Ex-Girlfriend
And I get that – it’s a normal part of getting dumped. So let’s be clear with each other. While you won’t “win” just because she blocked you, you can turn her blocking you into a massive victory for yourself.
More on that in just a minute, because we need to talk about one more important point.
Is It True That If She Blocks You, She Loves You?
While it’s possible that if she blocks you, she still loves you, it’s impossible to know for sure. There are multiple good reasons she may have for blocking you that don’t include her loving you.
If you are asking this question, it’s probably because part of you is holding out hope that she’s going to come running back to you. But as I’ve said before, love is not enough to make a relationship worth having.
Read More: Love Is Not Enough: Why She Loves You, But Doesn’t Want To Be With You
If you are still hung up on what she is thinking, you need to wake up my friend. You can’t live your life for someone else. It’s no way to live if you are constantly thinking about how someone else feels about you. You have no control over her feelings or her emotions.
You only have control over yourself.
So you need to avoid asking questions like…
How Long Will It Take Until She Unblocks Me?
It’s impossible to say how long it will take her to unblock you. It might take a few weeks, a few months, or a few years. It’s possible she will never unblock you.
I understand that you may have your reasons for wanting to wait for her to unblock you, whether that’s closure, wanting to remain friends, or something else entirely.
Read More: Should You Agree To Be Friends If She Dumps You?
But here’s the thing my friend, her blocking you, no matter what her reasons are should mean one thing, and one thing only for you: that you need to move on. I’m begging you here, as someone who cares about you and wants you to succeed. Have some self-respect for yourself.
If you are still struggling with closure, I completely understand. I understand if you want her to know how you’re feeling.
But just because I understand doesn’t mean I want to see you sabotaging yourself like this, when you’re chasing after a woman who is trying to tell you in as clear a way as possible to please move on.
Stop waiting on her to unblock you. Start taking yourself and your life seriously. I can help you. I have over 100 articles here that are meant to do just that – plus all kinds of other fun stuff I’m working on for you.
Wait, She Blocked Me But Still Talks To Me. What Does That Mean?
If she blocked you but still talks to you after she dumped you, you probably have a special situation. You probably are blocked on social media and texts, but she still sees you in person. Maybe you work together, have shared responsibilities, or some other shared commitment.
Either way, if she blocks you, my advice is still the same: move on. Chances are if she talks to you in person, she is doing it to be polite because she doesn’t want to cause a scene. All of my above advice still applies. If you are blocked, it’s because she doesn’t want you in her life at the moment, no matter what the reasons for blocking you are.
With that said, we only have one question let for today…
How Should You Handle Her Blocking You?
By now, you know exactly what I’m going to say here.
There’s only one way that you should handle her blocking you.
Have the grace to accept what has happened and turn your focus inward. Even if you feel like no one cares about you right now, I do. I want to see you succeed. It is literally my life’s mission to help you. So please, for your own sake, take my advice and let me help you to help yourself.
In the wise words of Will Smith:
If you’re new here, or you are just wondering where to start, I’ve put together a list of my recommended resources to help you get started on your journey.
Talk soon my friend,
Coach Jack
PS: If you want to get my expert advice on whether or not she’s gone for good, click here.